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Jasmine Abdullah
*16 years old
*S.M.K Damansara Jaya
*Click on my Friendster to know more?
Friday, December 21, 2007
12:54 AM
Beers, Beers, Beers. Why is everybody wasting their money on beers? Okay. a bottle of beer just like the one up there, can cost around RM10, right? If you go Clubbing/Drinking, you can easily drink around 3 bottles. Which means RM10x3=RM30. So, if you do that 3 times a week, means RM30x3=RM90, and if you do that every week, you'll spend RM90x4=RM360, a monthWhy don't you guys stop drinking, put all that money in a nice lil' red packet, and mail it to me. I promise I'll do good things for the community (like shopping till my ass falls off), and it's for the better. you know why? Because...
YOU DON'T WANNA END UP HAVING THIS LOOK!
And if you dont mail them to me FAST... you'll end up LIKE THIS!!
AAAHH! *faints*.
Other than getting beer bellies, you'll : barf, get hangovers, smell funny, get raped... you know, the usual. (haha XD)
And did you know, that just by having one glass of alcahol a day, you can get bowel cancer?
So DON'T DRINK. BE A MAN. DO THE RIGHT THING.
Monday, December 17, 2007
8:35 PM
My Question is WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR BORED?! ..
50 things to do when you're bored :
1. Wax the ceiling.
2. Loosen the lug nuts on your dad's new car.
3. Drop your cat from a high place, to see if it really does land on all four feet.
4. Repeat above until failure.
5. Shave (those places you think you wouldnt show.)
6.Cook a turtle.
7. Play Houdini with one of your siblings (if your not sure what your doing, your parents can
always make more XD)
.8. Braid your dogs hair.
9. Clean and polish your belly button.
10. Water your dog...see if he grows.
11. Wash a tree & Hug it :D show it some love* .
12. Shout at ppl for no reason.
13. Knight yourself and some close friends.(Sir Bitching whore)
14. Flirt with yourself in the mirror(its good practice)
.15 .....
16. Scare Steven King.
17. Give your cat a mohawk.
18. Purr.
19. Mow your carpet.
20. Rake your carpet (to clean up the clippings.)
21. Whine
22. Play Pat Boone records backwards.
23. Re-elect Richard Nixon.
24. Dress like your favorite Heavy Metal group...surprise your grandmother.
25. Listen to a painting.
26. Play with matches.
27. Buff your cat.
28. Raise professional racing ferrets
.29. Paint your home...day-glo orange.
30. Dial-a-Prayer and argue.
31. Learn Greek.
32. Read Homer in the original Greek
33. Change your mind.
34. Change it back.
35. Watch the sun...see if it moves.
36. Mail Jerry Falwell a Hustler magazine.
37. Recite romantic poetry...to your toaster.
38. Paint your windows.
39. Flash your goldfish.
40. Paint yourself to camouflage with the sofa.
41. Make snow-angles...on the soil in the back-yard.
42. Eat your toes.
43. Call 999, tell them you're bored.
44. If doing the above got you into prison, draw on the prison walls.
45. Vacuum yourself.
46. Let your dog pee in your neighbours yard. You pee there too.
47. Cook an egg.. on the roof of a car.
48. Dance in the yard in your knickers.
49. Sniff your cats armpits.. see if it smells.
50. Post and post like this post on your blog.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
6:29 PM
Millions of people with boobs reach for one every day, but how much do we really know about this most intimate apparel? Throughout history, undergarments have shaped women’s bodies to reflect the social expectations of the time. Nowhere is this more apparent than with the bra.
From boiling cauldrons (like the Harry Potter movie?) to silk looms to metal factories, this special traces the evolution of one of woman’s most provocative pieces of clothing.
Delicate fabric, exquisite details and curve-hugging cups make the bra an ultimate symbol of femininity, but behind the fragile exterior lies tough design, grueling construction and complicated science. Some of the facts and figures revealed in the special include the following:
• Caterpillar spit(eeeww?), dirt, crude oil and molten metal are several of the ingredients in a bra.
• There are over 40 components of a bra.
• Over 4 million new bras are created on average every day.
• Each woman owns an average of six and a half bras (where did the half come from?).
• Each woman owns an average of six and a half bras (where did the half come from?).
• In the last 15 years, the average bust size has increased from 34B to 36C (YEA! bigger boobs!).
• The modern system of bra sizing was invented in 1928.
• How many ounces in a cup? An A cup — approximately 8 fluid ounces; B cup — 13 ounces; C cup — 21 ounces; and D cup — 27 ounces.
• Women’s breasts can range from 10 ounces to 20 pounds, and a 1.6-ounce bra has to support all shapes and sizes in between (bras are strong).
• Consumers spend around $16 billion a year on bras.
The “over-shoulder-boulder-holder” is a necessary evil in many women’s lives…but who do we have to blame for this often uncomfortable, but ever-so-sexy piece of clothing?
Bra Styles
There are dozens of styles of bras to fit different tastes, sizes and particular occasions. Finding a bra that suits you should not be a problem. Once you have figured out your bra size and bra fitting requirements, you will want to decide what role your bra will play. For the guys, READ so that you won't ask your wife/girlfriend why she's wearing an ugly full cup bra at some point. (it's a wonder why guys don't ask why we wear sexy-type bras)
*Sports Bras: Designed to keep your breasts under control when undertaking any physical activity.
*Nursing Bras: Easy access to the food source for the breastfeeding mom.
*Maternity Bras: Supports daily breast growth.
*Mastectomy Bras: For your post mastectomy needs.
*Full Figure Bras: If you are a large-breasted woman, you will want a full-figured bra.
*Bridal Bras: Support for all that cake cutting.
*Underwire Bras: Torture device disguised as underwear.
*Vintage Bras: Remember the pointy, stick in your eye "bullet bras" from the 40's? Or the lung-compressing corset? Well, they're back and they are just as restrictive.
*Teen Bras: Designed to talk back and be surly.
*Belly Dance Bras: No matter what style of belly dance you may be studying, you will definitely want a beautiful belly dance bra. Guaranteed to improve your chest rolls.
*Leather Bras: If you like leather, the leather bra is one more way to get your fix (yea, more like if your boyfriend is one of those bikers with big Harley Davidson bikes).
*Sexy Bras: Depends on who you ask. Many would say NONE.
*Name Brand Bras: Some people only want brand names so that they can name drop at cocktail parties. But who talks about underwear at parties?
*Nursing Bras: Easy access to the food source for the breastfeeding mom.
*Maternity Bras: Supports daily breast growth.
*Mastectomy Bras: For your post mastectomy needs.
*Full Figure Bras: If you are a large-breasted woman, you will want a full-figured bra.
*Bridal Bras: Support for all that cake cutting.
*Underwire Bras: Torture device disguised as underwear.
*Vintage Bras: Remember the pointy, stick in your eye "bullet bras" from the 40's? Or the lung-compressing corset? Well, they're back and they are just as restrictive.
*Teen Bras: Designed to talk back and be surly.
*Belly Dance Bras: No matter what style of belly dance you may be studying, you will definitely want a beautiful belly dance bra. Guaranteed to improve your chest rolls.
*Leather Bras: If you like leather, the leather bra is one more way to get your fix (yea, more like if your boyfriend is one of those bikers with big Harley Davidson bikes).
*Sexy Bras: Depends on who you ask. Many would say NONE.
*Name Brand Bras: Some people only want brand names so that they can name drop at cocktail parties. But who talks about underwear at parties?
Well, it has definitely been a long process to what the bra looks and feels like today. From the Corset (open at the front to the waist, leaving the breasts uncovered. Small strips of leather round the waist were used to curve round the outline of the breasts), to the nifty sport-bras, it sure has been a very big change.
*I personally find this corset mentioned above VERY amusing*
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
12:24 AM
Back in the days it was sabre tooth tigers and wooly mammoths who were rocking the best fur - until man invented sewing and pinched it for his own wardrobe. Back before you could be "street"(there were no streets you see) prehistoric men would impress the ladies with their hoods of fur - if that didn't work they could always club the cave-ladies over the head and drag them back to the cave by their hair for some bump and grind.
These days clubbing people over the head, and wearing tiger fur is a bit frowned upon. Thank god for nylon...
__________________________________________________________________
From hearing people going on about hoodies these days, you would think only criminals and thugs wear them, BUT I KNOW BETTER! Back in the day the holiest on holy men wore them: Monks!
Now if wearing hoodies is good enough for the Almighty above, I am sure they are good enough to be worn in a shopping centre in Kent!
__________________________________________________________________
Robin Hood, Robin Hood, riding through the glen! Robin Hood, Robin Hood, with his band of men!
Okay okay, rhymes in the Robin Hood song are lame, but his cutfit certainly wasn't. Robin Hood was probably the first person who wore a hood to keep his face hidden. But robbing from the rich and giving to the poor is not something we reccomend these days, as the poor have job seekers allowance and theres not many town councillors who live in castles. But we'll let him off this time, as he wore a hoodie!
__________________________________________________________________
These days if Red Riding Hood turned up and grandma's house and there was a wolf dressed up in her bed, the girl would whip out the pepper spray and use it on the wolf until he passes out. Then the wolf would take out a personal injury claim against Little Red Riding Hood and sue her for millions of ringgit =)
In the old skool version however, the wood cutter turns up and shops up the Wolf in true gory fairytale style. I have to say I prefer this version. Oh I forgot to mention Little Red Riding hood looks pretty damn good in that outfit.
__________________________________________________________________
Anorak's (big sweaters with fur on the border of the hoodie) are the 1970's brother of the hoodie. Today you can still see them being worn by trainspotters, trendy geeks wh are trying to look "retro" and of you're lucky... that weird man in the park who doesn't seem to be wearing anything else underneath!! 0.0
The best place to pick one up is probably a local charity shop. And did I mention they come in wonderful colours of blue and orange. Well, at least the keep the rain off.
__________________________________________________________________
And now we arrive at the modern day. Despite the hoodie having been around since the beggining of time,(well, almost), we now have certain countries that are calling for it to be banned!
I want to show people that the hoodie can be worn with pride, by regular decent people! Don't let the thugs and criminals out there spoil the reputation of a decent bit of clothing!
__________________________________________________________________
(Hoodies rock my world!)
Monday, December 3, 2007
1:50 AM
You should always listen to your mom. Remember all those things she used to say over and over when you were a kid? She had some good advice for you back then, but you probably tuned it out. So I've updated some of her favorite admonishments for you to heed now that you're older. This Mother's Day, take the time to thank Mom for passing on her words of wisdom:
"Don't put anything in your (ear) PENIS sharper than your elbow."
You wouldn't believe how many guys have ended up in the emergency room because they didn't follow this advice and poked something they shouldn't have up their peter. Pencils, thermometers, bobby pins, birthday candles, paper clips...I'll spare you all the gory details. If you're at all curious, just don't do it. You might as well clean your ears with an ice pick.
"Eat your vegetables. Drink your juice. It'll make (you strong) YOUR CUM TASTE BETTER."
It's true! That healthy, balanced diet mom always encouraged you to eat can help promote better-tasting semen, especially if it includes lots of fresh fruits and vegetables. In fact, it's reported that a vegetarian diet will give both men and women better tasting juices down there. Of course, you don't have to tell mom why you're on a health kick, but she'll be proud anyway.
"Always wear clean underwear. You never know when you'll get (in an accident) LAID."
Chances are, if you get in an accident, your underwear is the last thing you'll be worried about. But if you find yourself in the middle of an unexpected hook-up? You'll be glad you're wearing a clean pair. So thank your mom the next time you've got a a friendly hand tugging at your (freshly laundered) tighty-whities or thong. Skid marks are such a turn off.
"If all your friends (jumped off a bridge) TRADED SEX FOR COKE would you do it too?"
It probably seemed like mom was always trying to ruin your fun, but really, she was just trying to keep you out of trouble. She wanted to instill some good judgment and prevent you from doing something you might regret. And discourage you from hanging out with those skeevy coke-whore friends of yours.
"Do you think your (dirty socks) USED CONDOMS are going to pick themselves up?"
Hopefully your mom trained you to at least pick up the most disgusting things you leave behind, like dirty underwear, smelly socks, crusty dishes, wet towels, used Kleenex, and spunk-filled condoms. You'll only have yourself to blame when you step on one while getting up to use the can in the middle of the night.
"Think about all the (starving) SEX-STARVED (children) COWORKERS in (India, Africa, China) YOUR DORM."
Mom always wanted you to look on the bright side and be grateful for what you had. Given the population rates in third-world countries, it's obvious that people there are getting it on, but the point is, if you take a look around your office or dorm, we're sure you can find someone less fortunate to compare yourself to. Your current girlfriend or boyfriend may look about as tempting as tuna helper right now, but at least you've got something on your plate.
"Don't put that in your (mouth) MOUTH/VAGINA/ASSHOLE - you don't know where it's been!"
So true, especially these days. They say when you sleep with someone, you're sleeping with every other person they had sex with. If that isn't enough to put a damper on your passion, let it at least make you think twice about hooking up with total skanks and hos and serve as a reminder to use protection.
"Pull up your pants. You look like a (plumber) LINDSAY LOHAN."
Sure, those low-rise jeans are what all the "cool kids" are wearing, but some trends are not worth following, especially if they make you look like cheap trash. Have a little class, and cover up that coin slot. And that goes quadruple if you're a guy.
"Don't sit so close to the set computer when you watch (tv) PORN. You'll ruin your eyes."
Actually, I can't verify that this is true. But it's probably not very good for your eyesight. And sitting too close to the computer greatly increases your chances of getting spunk on the keyboard and screen.
"Don't point that at your face. You'll (put an eye out) GET JIZZ IN YOUR EYE."
Be careful where you're aiming that thing, mister, especially if you've got a hair trigger. Whether you're pointing it at someone else or yourself, try to keep it away from the eyes. It won't make you blind for good, but cum in the eyes stings like hell.
"Don't take (candy) OPEN ALCAHOLIC BEVERAGES from (strangers) RANDOM GUYS AT PARTIES."
It might seem paranoid, but in this age of roofies and other date-rape drugs, women (and sometimes even men) have to be extra careful. There are too many stories of people getting victimized after having their drinks tampered with. You don't want to end up like a grown-up version of some cautionary after-school special.
"Wash behind your (ears) NUTSACK. You could grow potatoes back there."
I really hope you've been washing back there, but unlike your mom, we're not going to check. See the item on clean underwear, and if you haven't been keeping up with your hygiene, hit the showers and introduce your taint to some soap and hot water.
"How do you know you don't like (broccoli) SWALLOWING SEMEN/EATING PUSSY if you haven't tried it?"
Thank mom for this classic line that you can use on a girlfriend or boyfriend reluctant to do oral. Maybe he or she just needs a little encouragement. Sure, they may not like it, but they'll never know until they give it a chance.
"Wear your (overcoat) CONDOM! It looks like (rain) DISCHARGE out there and you could catch (pneumonia) THE CLAP."
Your mom was always looking out for and trying to protect you from dangers and diseases. She can't be with you looking over your shoulder every time you have sex (thank god, that would be really messed up), but hopefully some of her caution and warnings have taken hold and you'll reach for the rubbers before you dive in.
(yes people, i know it's gross, but its DAVID'S request. Blame him! hurry up! blame blame blame! I guess all I can say is, take this as a piece of advice. )
"Don't put anything in your (ear) PENIS sharper than your elbow."
You wouldn't believe how many guys have ended up in the emergency room because they didn't follow this advice and poked something they shouldn't have up their peter. Pencils, thermometers, bobby pins, birthday candles, paper clips...I'll spare you all the gory details. If you're at all curious, just don't do it. You might as well clean your ears with an ice pick.
"Eat your vegetables. Drink your juice. It'll make (you strong) YOUR CUM TASTE BETTER."
It's true! That healthy, balanced diet mom always encouraged you to eat can help promote better-tasting semen, especially if it includes lots of fresh fruits and vegetables. In fact, it's reported that a vegetarian diet will give both men and women better tasting juices down there. Of course, you don't have to tell mom why you're on a health kick, but she'll be proud anyway.
"Always wear clean underwear. You never know when you'll get (in an accident) LAID."
Chances are, if you get in an accident, your underwear is the last thing you'll be worried about. But if you find yourself in the middle of an unexpected hook-up? You'll be glad you're wearing a clean pair. So thank your mom the next time you've got a a friendly hand tugging at your (freshly laundered) tighty-whities or thong. Skid marks are such a turn off.
"If all your friends (jumped off a bridge) TRADED SEX FOR COKE would you do it too?"
It probably seemed like mom was always trying to ruin your fun, but really, she was just trying to keep you out of trouble. She wanted to instill some good judgment and prevent you from doing something you might regret. And discourage you from hanging out with those skeevy coke-whore friends of yours.
"Do you think your (dirty socks) USED CONDOMS are going to pick themselves up?"
Hopefully your mom trained you to at least pick up the most disgusting things you leave behind, like dirty underwear, smelly socks, crusty dishes, wet towels, used Kleenex, and spunk-filled condoms. You'll only have yourself to blame when you step on one while getting up to use the can in the middle of the night.
"Think about all the (starving) SEX-STARVED (children) COWORKERS in (India, Africa, China) YOUR DORM."
Mom always wanted you to look on the bright side and be grateful for what you had. Given the population rates in third-world countries, it's obvious that people there are getting it on, but the point is, if you take a look around your office or dorm, we're sure you can find someone less fortunate to compare yourself to. Your current girlfriend or boyfriend may look about as tempting as tuna helper right now, but at least you've got something on your plate.
"Don't put that in your (mouth) MOUTH/VAGINA/ASSHOLE - you don't know where it's been!"
So true, especially these days. They say when you sleep with someone, you're sleeping with every other person they had sex with. If that isn't enough to put a damper on your passion, let it at least make you think twice about hooking up with total skanks and hos and serve as a reminder to use protection.
"Pull up your pants. You look like a (plumber) LINDSAY LOHAN."
Sure, those low-rise jeans are what all the "cool kids" are wearing, but some trends are not worth following, especially if they make you look like cheap trash. Have a little class, and cover up that coin slot. And that goes quadruple if you're a guy.
"Don't sit so close to the set computer when you watch (tv) PORN. You'll ruin your eyes."
Actually, I can't verify that this is true. But it's probably not very good for your eyesight. And sitting too close to the computer greatly increases your chances of getting spunk on the keyboard and screen.
"Don't point that at your face. You'll (put an eye out) GET JIZZ IN YOUR EYE."
Be careful where you're aiming that thing, mister, especially if you've got a hair trigger. Whether you're pointing it at someone else or yourself, try to keep it away from the eyes. It won't make you blind for good, but cum in the eyes stings like hell.
"Don't take (candy) OPEN ALCAHOLIC BEVERAGES from (strangers) RANDOM GUYS AT PARTIES."
It might seem paranoid, but in this age of roofies and other date-rape drugs, women (and sometimes even men) have to be extra careful. There are too many stories of people getting victimized after having their drinks tampered with. You don't want to end up like a grown-up version of some cautionary after-school special.
"Wash behind your (ears) NUTSACK. You could grow potatoes back there."
I really hope you've been washing back there, but unlike your mom, we're not going to check. See the item on clean underwear, and if you haven't been keeping up with your hygiene, hit the showers and introduce your taint to some soap and hot water.
"How do you know you don't like (broccoli) SWALLOWING SEMEN/EATING PUSSY if you haven't tried it?"
Thank mom for this classic line that you can use on a girlfriend or boyfriend reluctant to do oral. Maybe he or she just needs a little encouragement. Sure, they may not like it, but they'll never know until they give it a chance.
"Wear your (overcoat) CONDOM! It looks like (rain) DISCHARGE out there and you could catch (pneumonia) THE CLAP."
Your mom was always looking out for and trying to protect you from dangers and diseases. She can't be with you looking over your shoulder every time you have sex (thank god, that would be really messed up), but hopefully some of her caution and warnings have taken hold and you'll reach for the rubbers before you dive in.
(yes people, i know it's gross, but its DAVID'S request. Blame him! hurry up! blame blame blame! I guess all I can say is, take this as a piece of advice. )
Sunday, December 2, 2007
11:58 PM
Bear with it guys! you can do it!So guys want to know what to do when their lady love is a bomb waiting to explode in the face of a puny annoyance? Pre Menstrual Stress lasts approximately four to five days. If you're lucky, you'll live through to the other side.Here's a quick survival list of how to handle the demon:
1)In fact, flattery will get you everywhere.
2)Try not to be emotionally needy/annoying/tell fart jokes/in fact, just remain scarce.
3)Don't argue.
4)Agree with everything she says.
5)Tell her she's beautiful, perhaps 5 000 times a day, even if she has a giant zit pulsating like Cyclops' eye on her forehead.
6)Actually, just tell her she's beautiful every five seconds.
7)Also under no circumstances point out or ask what 'that bulging thing is' on her face.
8)Bring her stuff. F@ck experiences, chicks want stuff. Throw chocolate at her.
9)Don't be pathetic
10)Don't be abstract
11)Don't be condescending
12)Don't be annoying
13) Don't be high maintenance
14) Don't ask her when the PMS will be over
15) Don't be a prick
16) Don't be stupid
17) Don't be a smart-ass
18) Don't be perverse
19)Don't be arrogant
20)Don't be normal
21)Don't be strange
22) Don't be pragmatic
23) Don't be useless
24) Tip: Angst can be alleviated through copulative mediums
25) Don't cancel last minute. (My God this annoys me).
26) Achieve the impossible
27) Be hot
28) Stick to your promises - follow through people – follow through
29) Realise it's only four days of hell. FOUR DAYS. GIVE HER FOUR DAYS!!.
30) And for God's sake: When a woman is in a bad mood and she's not on PMS – because women CAN have a shitty day without having PMS – don't whatever you do - ask her if she's 'on.'
31) Be there for her all the time
32) Let her shout. Take it like a MAN.
awww, I know It's alot, but c'mon.. you wouldnt want her to throw things at you like a smelly fish/piece of meat/pork/chair/the computer set/the home-toolbox/the TV set/toaster/... the list just GOES ON AND ON AND ON AND ON. So just BEAR with her a little. Okay, maybe alot. It's just for a few days, and then you can get it on and have some SEXY TIME! wooo!
(for Chern Yao's request)
1)In fact, flattery will get you everywhere.
2)Try not to be emotionally needy/annoying/tell fart jokes/in fact, just remain scarce.
3)Don't argue.
4)Agree with everything she says.
5)Tell her she's beautiful, perhaps 5 000 times a day, even if she has a giant zit pulsating like Cyclops' eye on her forehead.
6)Actually, just tell her she's beautiful every five seconds.
7)Also under no circumstances point out or ask what 'that bulging thing is' on her face.
8)Bring her stuff. F@ck experiences, chicks want stuff. Throw chocolate at her.
9)Don't be pathetic
10)Don't be abstract
11)Don't be condescending
12)Don't be annoying
13) Don't be high maintenance
14) Don't ask her when the PMS will be over
15) Don't be a prick
16) Don't be stupid
17) Don't be a smart-ass
18) Don't be perverse
19)Don't be arrogant
20)Don't be normal
21)Don't be strange
22) Don't be pragmatic
23) Don't be useless
24) Tip: Angst can be alleviated through copulative mediums
25) Don't cancel last minute. (My God this annoys me).
26) Achieve the impossible
27) Be hot
28) Stick to your promises - follow through people – follow through
29) Realise it's only four days of hell. FOUR DAYS. GIVE HER FOUR DAYS!!.
30) And for God's sake: When a woman is in a bad mood and she's not on PMS – because women CAN have a shitty day without having PMS – don't whatever you do - ask her if she's 'on.'
31) Be there for her all the time
32) Let her shout. Take it like a MAN.
awww, I know It's alot, but c'mon.. you wouldnt want her to throw things at you like a smelly fish/piece of meat/pork/chair/the computer set/the home-toolbox/the TV set/toaster/... the list just GOES ON AND ON AND ON AND ON. So just BEAR with her a little. Okay, maybe alot. It's just for a few days, and then you can get it on and have some SEXY TIME! wooo!
(for Chern Yao's request)
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